i hate my house. im nt even calling it a home. my home is at holland there. my home is that marvellous mansionette which i spent most of my years growing up. my home could even have been paris there.
why am i being raised differently? why me, and not any others? and why the fuck did they raise me in a high environment last time?? LOOK AT ME NOW
materialistic. bratty. spoiled. tantrumatic. and its portrayed as if its my fault(yar i hate u dad) look at me now.
insecure. and missing my REAL life. what happened to the ballet lessons, and shopping every weekend, and getting cool stuff every week and getting what i want and my relaxing high teas and my bundles of gifts and oodles of attention my LIFE.? i hate this place. i want my own room again. i want my old house, my old sancuary.. this place is driving me NUTS like a fucker.
the sound of a stupid crying baby everyday, the sight of messy area everday, the smell of food downstairs?? this is ridiculous!! why am i forced to live under these cb circumstances, sumth im not born to tolerate with?? I CANNOT LIVE LIKE THIS. i cannot work in this sort of environment! THEY dont understand me! no one does actually.. they would just ask me to sabar, some even told me not to be selfish, and even to grow up! BUT im gg thru this myself. no one felt my lovely childhood. no one feels my sacrifices in the present. no one knows how its like to be ME.
sometimes, i wonder how it would be like if i lived in paris frm the start. i think my life would be normal for a change. but fate wants it to be this way. God wants me to suffer like siao. now im seperated from my true origin, not even knowing anyone of my real life relatives.
i am depressed. I WANT TO GO HOME. but where is home. in the place where i call home, its too late for them to recognize me as a part of their family. right now, im stuck with a bunch of STRANGERS.
i hate my house. im nt even calling it a home. my home is at holland there. my home is that marvellous mansionette which i spent most of my years growing up. my home could even have been paris there.
why am i being raised differently? why me, and not any others? and why the fuck did they raise me in a high environment last time?? LOOK AT ME NOW
materialistic. bratty. spoiled. tantrumatic. and its portrayed as if its my fault(yar i hate u dad) look at me now.
insecure. and missing my REAL life. what happened to the ballet lessons, and shopping every weekend, and getting cool stuff every week and getting what i want and my relaxing high teas and my bundles of gifts and oodles of attention my LIFE.? i hate this place. i want my own room again. i want my old house, my old sancuary.. this place is driving me NUTS like a fucker.
the sound of a stupid crying baby everyday, the sight of messy area everday, the smell of food downstairs?? this is ridiculous!! why am i forced to live under these cb circumstances, sumth im not born to tolerate with?? I CANNOT LIVE LIKE THIS. i cannot work in this sort of environment! THEY dont understand me! no one does actually.. they would just ask me to sabar, some even told me not to be selfish, and even to grow up! BUT im gg thru this myself. no one felt my lovely childhood. no one feels my sacrifices in the present. no one knows how its like to be ME.
sometimes, i wonder how it would be like if i lived in paris frm the start. i think my life would be normal for a change. but fate wants it to be this way. God wants me to suffer like siao. now im seperated from my true origin, not even knowing anyone of my real life relatives.
i am depressed. I WANT TO GO HOME. but where is home. in the place where i call home, its too late for them to recognize me as a part of their family. right now, im stuck with a bunch of STRANGERS.
i want my real familyT.T
